hi my names louise im 16 years old with my whole life ahead of me yet i dont feel like it. it feels directionless & i dont want it 2 last any longer im always tryin 2 overdose & tryin 2 drop hints 2 people but its like nobody will listen 2 me becoz im juz a 16 yr old teen with 'hormones' & im 'confuzed'. i no im confuzed im not sure y i here, wats the point of me livin here if im usless??? i dont want 2 die realy i just want 2 overdose enough that i end up in hospital & then maybe my parents would listen 2 me more. but im scared i mite take 2 much then no1 would forgive me for doin it & they would b disapointed in me. plz help me, i dont no how but maybe jus talk 2 me so i at least no somebody out there in this hateful world sum1 understands me & knows wat im goin through. thank u xxx

I don't thhink anything is wrong with you because I have definatly been where u are at right now... many times... and theres nothing wrong with me. I mean, it seems like no-one is willing to recognise your suffering unless you are complelty non functional... or psychotic or something. But us so called normal people suffer too, often to the point of serious distress, especially when it goes unrecognised, it seems like no one cares that you are in great distress and every day it feels like you can't cope, but somehow you manage to cope well enough to fake like you're not dying inside... but that only makes the anguish and frustration worse?

Is this right? Because I have definatly been there, at one point I decided to stop thinking about suicide if I wasn't going to do it, so I made a real plan to actually do it to prove I wasn't just attention seeking (heaven forbid !!!) and I was **** lucky that shortly after I had done I stoped feeling bad

thanx 4 writin bk & yea i guess ur rite, but still it juz feels so hard 2 understand were im goin if i dont no. i juz want my family 2 listen 2 me once in a while 2 help me find ,my way. like last nite i *** in from work & my older bro does wat he normally does & started teasin me & i hadnt dun anyfink except go in2 the kitchen 2 cook sum dinner, my mum saw dat he started it & wen i burst in2 tears bcoz it gets 2 me the fact dat he's like this. my mum juz said i waz stupid. well maybe i am but she cld at leats say ,oh y'no wats wrong? becoz i neva used 2 cry ova him teasin me coz well its kids crap. den she told my dad, my dad had a go at me, & its like hello? stop havin a go at me & start listenin 2 me but wen i said dat they juz sent me up2 my room. but realisin wat uv said, im goin 2 c my careers adviser 2 help me get a decent job, & im goin 2 flat share with anotha girl i no so dat way i can walk in da door from work & not hav ppl makin me unhappy but me juz doin wat i want & bein allowed 2 make mistakes without bein tld its wrong. thanx xxxx

I've been there tooo....most times the only place that I got any support was from chat rooms and things like this. The best thing I could tell you is to see a DR. I know thats hard, belived me I know, it took me 5 years and months of pain to finally do it. I have been on medication for 1 month, and things have never been better. You don't have to feel like you do...Yeah, thats hard to hear from someone that you don;t know, but it's true.. I started to feel the same way around age 15, now 24, I realize that I should have done something sooner. Even if you make the appointment yourself, and go yourself it will help... ALWAYS remember your not alone...if you need to talk feel free to e-mail me anytime....kjarosiewicz@yahoo.com...
take care!

you know how i sed it must be normal cuz i have felt like that too - ho hum, I a few weeks back got out of mental hospital... so maybe not so normal :p Was waaaay unhappyy (and possesed ...hmmm) then... now way hyper. LOL

Hi there Louise;
I too feel the same way you do. I sometimes wish I could turn back the clock to my highschool years and have someone realize that I was suffering from depression. Now 22 years later I am still in search of answers, a healthcare professional who is genuinely concerned or some meds that will finally work.
I feel that the sooner you seek help from a doctor the better off you will be. Depression affects more people than anyone realizes and it can be very serious. It has been very bad for me a couple of times. Memories of too many pills at once and scars on my arms that when people ask about them, what do you say??
I go through periods when I long just want to escape, to leave and never return to depression. I am successful for a while and then it rears it's ugly head and it seems that each time it does it is stronger. It truly sucks.
Research depression and it's symptoms, keep a journal of your feelings and mood and circumstances surrounding them. Try not to beat yourself up. I have done that for years and I wouldn't think about treating any other living being the way I mistreat myself.
Do you go to church? I know deep down that God is the answer, but giving up total control to Him is very difficult and sometimes I don't feel worthy enough to do so anyway. My physical lack of strength and my mental well-being out way a lot.
Seek help, depression can go on for years especially when circumstances don't go well. Do constructive things, go to the doctor, talk to one good friend or a pastor. If anyone says to you, "Just give yourself a kick in the rear and get on with it, things can't be that bad." Well you know what, maybe on the outside things look great, but no one can see in our heart or in our mind and that is where the pain and confusion lie.
From personal experience also, stay away from alcohol, pills, anything can feel good at the time and yes they are a good escape, but we always return, don't we? Just, please don't hurt yourself.

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Replying to:

hi my names louise im 16 years old with my whole life ahead of me yet i dont feel like it. it feels directionless & i dont want it 2 last any longer im always tryin 2 overdose & tryin 2 drop hints 2 people but its like nobody will listen 2 me becoz im juz a 16 yr old teen with 'hormones' & im 'confuzed'. i no im confuzed im not sure y i here, wats the point of me livin here if im usless??? i dont want 2 die realy i just want 2 overdose enough that i end up in hospital & then maybe my parents would listen 2 me more. but im scared i mite take 2 much then no1 would forgive me for doin it & they would b disapointed in me. plz help me, i dont no how but maybe jus talk 2 me so i at least no somebody out there in this hateful world sum1 understands me & knows wat im goin through. thank u xxx